Hungarian Christmas Flickr photo gallery is here.

To Kaposvar, Hungary for Christmas

I wasn’t sure what to expect to expect of her old man. Conservative. Xenophobic. Racist? I had gleaned these descriptors from stories she told me about him before we left. A physics teacher and avid hater of the French, Romanians, and, like all Hungarians, Gypsies. If I wasn’t a white guy she simply wouldn’t take me to her family Christmas in Kaposvar.

They haven’t always gotten on so well after things were a bit rocky and Kata left her home town for Budapest when she was about 20, but it’s gotten better. Mom and Dad got married when they were about 20, but I hadn’t really heard a lot about mom other than that she is a chemistry teacher and, like Kata, is a good cook. They speak no English.

It made for a tenuous mental image of Dad and a slightly eyebrow-raising primer to my first Hungarian Christmas. But, well, it turns out liked Dad a lot and Christmas in the southern Hungarian town of Kaposvar was quite good. This is what Kaposvar looks like during the day:

I actually first met Dad in the middle of nowhere on a pitch-black night under a highway overpass where Kata and I changed cars to get the rest of the way to Kaposvar, where Mom and Dad live. A hand-shake, car ride, and some Hungarian spoken in the front seat later and we were at their second-floor apartment.

Mom and Dad greeted me with warm smiles and Kata offered to show me around the house. Dad had a different idea, though.

We were inside for less than five minutes when Dad ushered us in to the living room and opened a cabinet stocked full of hard alcohol bottles, including several variants of a Hungarian special called Palinka. He took one out, looked at me presenting the bottle, and started talking in Hungarian, which Kata translated.

“This is the best Palinka you can buy in Hungary.” Putting the bottle back and extracting another one that had no label and was full of clear liquid, he continued, “But this one is better. And it’s stronger. You can’t buy it. A friend made it. Want some?”

Yes. It felt like that scene in Pulp Fiction: “But this one… this is the F-ing Madman.”

He got three shot glasses and filled them up. Dad was giving me Hungarian moonshine first thing in his house. Nice.

We smiled broadly as we toasted in Hungarian. I’m not sure how to spell it properly, but saying “Cheers” in Hungarian sounds about like “igga-shigga-dra.” I wasn’t sure if I should sip the white lightning or throw it back, so I waited to see what he did. Sip, savor, and enjoy. So I did. It was strong. Kata confirmed that it was more than 100 proof. With smiles all around, both my body and my expectations for Christmas warmed up right away.

Kata, the Hungarian Dancer

I met Dad’s daughter, Kata, in Budapest. That’s her on the right. She’s fun, outgoing, about my age, works for a big international company doing travel finance, and was a dancer for 20 years. She likes horror movies and her cat, Boris. She’s got trophies and medals hanging in her apartment from dance competitions she’s won over the years. She’s showed me video, too, of some dances and it’s quite impressive. She expertly spins around in sleek and sexy dresses that she sewed and decorated herself. Makes me wish I could dance, but I know I’m forever relagated to being one of the wallflowers when it comes to actual dancing.

We got together a few times in Budapest and she invited me to her family Christmas. “Why not?” I thought, “That sounds cool.” The other less than desirable choices would be either trying to find a train or bus amongst the striking workers and get to Romania before Christmas or spending Christmas alone in the hostel owner’s sister’s apartment because the hostel would be closed for Christmas. Both alternate options sounded frought with suck.

So after spending the weekend together watching horror movies and eating Hungarian food that she cooked, to Christmas we went. We needed to eat something on the morning of Christmas eve before meeting our ride that would take us to Kaposvar. Walking around looking for a restaurant, the only thing that was open was a McDonalds. Ironic. However, the Big Mac value meal was offset by the deliciousness that Mom had prepared later in the night.

Christmas in Kaposvar and Drinking with Dad

The two days and two nights were a lot of fun. I got on well with the family, ate fantastic traditional Hungarian food, and shared in the present-opening. We met her brother and his girlfriend, too. Dad showed me physics tricks at breakfast like balancing a fork and spoon on the tip of of a toothpick. I fielded questions about how we celebrate Christmas in America and showed pictures of my own family.

The city itself was small, cozy, nice, and decorated for the holiday season. Kata’s parents live right in the center of town, so we were able to go on some nice walks right out the front door. I got to see a nice theater, the town Christmas tree, and Kata’s high school.

I hadn’t had a chance to pick up a present for the family before leaving, but realized that a bottle of wine would probably be just what the doctor ordered after meeting Dad. While they went to Grandma’s house on Christmas day, I wandered around until I found a Shell gas station that was open and had a surprisingly good selection of wine.

Dad was constantly offering me alcohol. He likes to have a shot of something hard before each meal because, as he says, “It opens up the stomach.” Right. Whatever you gotta tell yourself, Dad. I think he wanted a partner in crime or something, but I politely turned down shots of straight Bushmills scotch before breakfast.

We couldn’t speak to each other, but he loved to pull out a small atlas and point out where whatever drink he had currently given me was from in Hungary. Here are a few pictures of the goings-on:

Dad’s Shocker Present

The most popular and interesting present was from Kata’s mom to her dad. It’s called the Lanaform Body Stim and is described on the box as an “electro-stimulation appliance.”

There is a large TV remote-sized controller that you put the batteries in with four electrodes connected to it through wires that you stick whereever you need electro-stimulation on your body. There are various stimulation modes with names like, “Hammering,” “Acupuncture,” and “Massage.”

Dad immediately opened the box and set to figuring out how to use it. The LCD screen and all of the controls were in English. He futzed around with it for a while to no avail.

Eventually, he simply took his shirt off, stuck the electrodes on his back, and handed the controller to Kata. She figured it out, cranked up the power, and Dad’s shoulders began to jerk with each shock from the electrode pads. He sat there smiling as his body periodically jerked uncontrollably from the Body Stim while we all laughed.

It was ridiculous and hilarious. We all tried it. I just pulled my shirt up and let them stick the shockers on me when he offered it to me. Both Kata and I hated the thing. Dad must have liked it, though, because he had fallen asleep in his chair with the electrodes stuck on his belly when we came back from an evening walk around the city.

On Being Away from Friends and Family

Overall, it was a really nice Christmas. My Hungarian family was more than generous and welcoming to share their home, food, and celebration with.

Of course, it was strange to not be with my own family and friends. I got a chance to call some people on Christmas day, but that is obviously not the same as being with them. I wasn’t there to hug my mom and sister, play Street Fighter II Turbo with Craig, and high five Andrew and Erin for their Christmas Eve engagement.

That said, I didn’t feel sad like I did at Thanksgiving when I was sitting alone in my apartment in Poland for most of the day. It was great to get out and spend time with some nice people.

I feel fortuante to have been invited and share the time together.

Moving Forward

The damn train strike is still on. They ran the trains for Christmas day, but are now striking again. Seeing as how I’m having a good time here, I’m going to just stick around until after New Years. It sounds like there will be some good parties to go to in the coming days, too.

As per usual, plenty more pictures in the Flickr set.

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